A playboy photographer (Matthew McConaughey) is visited by three ghosts who allow him to see his past, present, and future love life for what it is — a chance to get shirtless! For some reason, he wants to end up with the girl he let get away (Jennifer Garner), even though they're clearly opposites: At one point, she says, ''We gotta button you up. You look like a gay pirate.'' Speaking of not being buttoned up, here's a tour through the Shirtless McConaughey Museum.
Nothing says successful 1920s bank robber like a man sipping champagne in a bubble bath. Wearing those three-piece suits must've just killed McConaughey.
McConaughey is brushing his teeth sans shirt because he:
A. Doesn't want to get toothpaste on his clothes
B. Likes to have something to stare at while he's cleaning his gums
C. Can't feel constricted when working with his mouth
D. None of the above — does he really need a reason?
Even in a twisty film about a serial killer — or two — who thinks he's doing God's work, there's time (roughly 35 seconds) to watch TV shirtless.
When you smoke cigar butts (yes, you read that right), sport a vicious ego, rock a naked pate, and slay fire-breathing dragons for a living, why in the world would you ever deign to cover your manly bod?
After teaching the object of his (maybe) affection Andie (Kate Hudson) to ride a motorcycle, Ben (McConaughey) escorts her into the bathroom so she can, you know, wash off all the dirt. One thing leads to another and — bam! — his shirt is off. It's that fast, folks. And apparently it works every time because after this scene Andie was like putty in his bare arms.
It's projects like this one — about a team of treasure hunters who set out to unearth a famous ship from the African desert — that make us wonder just how high the actor places ''warm climates in which beads of sweat can reflect off of my bronzed chest'' on his must-have list for scripts.
The time code is only 2:11 before this romantic comedy gets McConaughey shirtless — having sex in his bedroom in his parents' house. At 3:51, we enjoy a proper (read: full) view of his chest following a shower. Though a sailing scene with the woman (Sarah Jessica Parker) his parents hire to encourage him to empty the nest proves to be a false alarm, the world rights itself by 36:48, when he's surfing. We even get a bonus shirtless Bradley Cooper. You're forgiven, world.
Pecs mark the spot in the treasure-hunting action flick in which McConaughey's chest stares right at you for what feels like the entire 113 minute running time. Now that's real gold.
If you don't count the scenes when he's wearing a wetsuit, there's only one in which McConaughey isn't shirtless. At least the skin makes sense: he's playing a longboarding soul surfer without cash and waves, who's pursued for a reality TV show and a virtual reality video game. Perhaps that's why Woody Harrelson, as his equally stoned manager, steals the movie? And that's saying something, considering McConaughey plays the didgeridoo buck naked.
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