Saturday 25 July 2009

Sexual Hypocrisy

Larry Craig James McGreevey Bill Clinton Larry Craig
Mark Sanford
John Ensign
Bill Clinton
James McGreevey
Mark Foley
Bob Livingston
Ted Haggard
Newt Gingrich

This list represents just a few of the better-known examples of public hypocrisy in the realm of sexuality. They said one thing, and did another. They preached monogamy and failed in following their own statements. The hypocrisy of these men highlight how easy it is to get caught in the trap.

One of the assignments I have clients complete is a "personal definition of sexual health." In the assignment, a person identifies the values by which he or she wants to live, and then uses those values to define acceptable sexual behaviors. One very important thing to keep in mind is it is your responsibility to make sure your values and behaviors are in sync.

The key to this process is to be responsible and honest about how you want to live your life. If you want monogamy, then it should represent your values. Choosing monogamy because of cultural expectations, or it's what your family wants, or it's what your partner wants, are the wrong reasons for monogamy. If you don't want monogamy, it is your responsibility to be open and honest before hand.

While monogamy might be the hot button issue, the personal definition of sexual health covers a range of topics ranging from body image, masturbation, fantasy, intimacy, spirituality, and types of sexual behaviors, to name some of the bigger topics. Only when you know yourself will you be able to be in relationship with others. Only when you know yourself will you be able to avoid the trap of hypocrisy.

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