Blue's Duncan James: I have flings with men
He's had female lovers by the score, but now the pop heart-throb reveals the incredible truth
POP hunk Duncan James last night confessed his shocking gay secret and admitted: "I'm bisexual. I've been in loving relationships with men as well as women - and I'm not ashamed.
"But even though I fancy men, I still fancy WOMEN too."
The Blue singer's revelation will stun his millions of female fans worldwide plus the dozens of women he has been linked with, including Geri Halliwell, Tara Palmer Tomkinson, Martine McCutcheon and ex-Big Brother winner Kate Lawler.
But on the eve of the boyband's reunion tour, the handsome singer says it is time for him to let his fans know the truth.
In an emotional interview with the News of the World he said: "I was living a secret life. I went through a process of asking what the f*** am I?
"Am I gay? Am I straight? Am I bi? That's why I was so frightened about talking. Now, in my early 30s, I know who I am and I'm proud of who I am. I don't want to hide anymore.
"I don't feel I should launch a big comeback with Blue hiding this - I don't want to go back to the time in the band when I felt I had to keep certain things quiet. I want to be OUT and say I've had relationships with men as well as women.
"So doing this interview gives me the ability to go forward."
I'm one hundred per cent happy to be bisexual
Strict Catholic Duncan, 31, first fell in love with a man EIGHT years ago - at the height of Blue's fame. Since then he has been with men and women, and fathered a daughter with his ex-girlfriend Claire Granger. But it took him years to confess his sexuality to the most important people in his life - Claire, 32, the other Blue stars and his mum.
Dunc said: "I wanted to be able to say to someone, 'This is going on and I don't know what to do,' but I was too SCARED.
"My mother was the closest person to me. But I didn't know how to tell her because I wanted her to love me and accept me. I was really paranoid and emotional.
"I flew her to Los Angeles for a holiday. I was thinking about it the whole trip - it was building up in my head.
"I'd never talked to my mum about sex and relationships. It was quite a taboo subject because we came from a Catholic upbringing.
"One night towards the end of the trip, I knocked on my mum's door before she went to bed. I was looking down and avoiding her eyes. I said, 'I need to talk to you'.
"She said, 'Oh my God, what's wrong, are you all right?'
"I responded, 'I need to tell you something. I've been in a relationship with a guy and I'm really confused about it. I haven't been able to talk to anyone for a couple of years.'
"She hugged me and couldn't believe it. She said, 'I thought you were going to tell me you were dying or something. Hundreds of people have had things with guys as well as girls. I love you, that doesn't matter to me.'
"We were flooded with tears. It had come out. I'd told my mum and she still loved me. I went up to my room after and sat on my bed crying. I realised, 'I can do this.' It gave me the strength to start opening up to my close friends." Duncan then told bandmates, Simon Webbe, Lee Ryan and Anthony Costa.
He recalled: "I thought there might be weirdness but there wasn't. All of the boys accepted it. We were perceived as lads who went around and slept with women but on the inside we had a lot of love for each other. We always hugged and kissed each other.
"I told Simon first. He went straight away, 'Is that all you're worried about? I love you man. That's cool. You're not alone. It doesn't change anything for us.'
"I spoke to Lee next then Ant. They were really supportive too. After that I actually felt quite comfortable with myself."
Duncan's first relationship with a man was in 2001, the year the band were celebrating their first three No1 hits - All Rise, Too Close and If You Come Back.
He said: "I'd never been intimate with a man. I'd been quite happy having girlfriends.
"But I met a guy. He was my friend at first but we took the friendship to the next level.
"Up until that point I'd never had those feelings towards a guy before. But this person came into my life and put a spanner in the works. I definitely loved him. It was my first experience like that.
"I never believed I could have those feelings for a guy. It had been so closed to me being a strict Catholic."
Duncan was also desperate to hide the relationship because of his status as one of pop's biggest heartthrobs. He explained: "When you're a young band trying to be successful, there's a lot of pressure on you to be clean-cut and accessible to your female fans.
There were signs I was that way inclined
"And it might sound greedy but I genuinely was enjoying having women throwing themselves at us.
"Yes, I was labelled a womaniser and yes, I did sleep with a lot of women. But there were tell-tale signs I was that way inclined. I've always been very theatrical and loved being on stage.
"I was so confused about everything. Blue were becoming more and more successful. I felt frightened. I bottled it in and didn't tell anyone. It was almost like it didn't happen.
"I was having relationships with girls as well. This was a secret on the side. In hindsight, that wasn't the way to deal with it. It's not nice to treat people in that way."
The only other boyband star who had confessed he wasn't straight was Boyzone's Stephen Gately, who revealed in 1999 he was gay.
But just as Duncan was thinking about coming out to his fans in 2004, girlfriend Claire told him she was expecting his baby. She fell pregnant when they briefly rekindled their relationship after splitting up.
However, Duncan was scared that if the public knew he was bisexual, their child would get teased at school.
He recalled: "I'd had very high-profile relationships. They weren't frauds or cover-ups. They were real.
"I loved Claire. It wasn't an immaculate conception!
"The first thing I did when she rang me up and told me she was pregnant was say, 'I need to sit you down and tell you about EVERYTHING.' I had to be completely honest with her.
"She was amazing and said, 'I love you for who you are. Regardless of what your sexual feelings are, I know you would be a great dad. Bringing up our daughter is the most important thing.' But it was tough during the pregnancy.
"I think she wondered how this was going to affect our daughter when she was a little bit older.
"Would she get bullied in the playground because her daddy slept with guys or was bisexual? All of those things went through her head and mine, if I was honest.
"But we decided it was no longer about a sexual relationship between us and instead about a strong bond to bring up our daughter."
Their little girl, Tianie-Finne James, is now four years old - and Duncan has a good relationship with Claire, who's found love with someone else.
Plus he isn't so scared about his daughter knowing who he is. "I hope when she grows up she is accepting of her daddy," he said.
Duncan - born in Salisbury, Wilts - is currently single and hoping to find love . . . with a man OR woman.
He said: "Being bisexual as a man is a taboo subject but I'm 100 per cent happy with who I am.
"If I have a connection with someone on a deep level that is what it's about for me.
"And if I'm with someone then I am monogamous.
"I'm sure a lot of gay people would be put off by the thought of having sex with a woman. It's not like that for me. I still find women attractive.
"In a man or a woman I look for someone who is sensitive and caring. I like someone who has nice features too.
"I don't feel it's harder to be with a guy. This has been my life now for a long time. It's not a big deal to me anymore. But I've slept with way more women than men.
"I can still look at women now and think they're sexy. I love being intimate with a woman, I love breasts. I do think girls can be a lot more emotional.
"I know most gay guys think, 'Bi Now, Gay Later' and maybe one day the thought of being with a woman won't work for me.
"But likewise, maybe the thought of being with a guy might be the same. I might want to settle down with a girl to have a family lifestyle. That appeals to me too.
"Mainly I just want to be happy. I want to be in a long-term relationship and, most importantly, be in love."
In the meantime Duncan - who was in ITV's Dancing on Ice after Blue split in 2005 - is concentrating on preparing for Blue's greatest hits tour, which starts next year.
Afterwards the band are heading back to the studio to record a new album to rival their previous ones All Rise and One Love.
Duncan says he is ready to face the spotlight again - this time with fans knowing his secret.
He mused: "I think this is going to shock a lot of people. Obviously there are some who aren't going to like it.
"But I'm not going to be rubbing this in the public's face because that's not who I am. I don't want to offend anybody.
"But I'm at a place where I'm finally comfortable with myself after 31 years.
"I'm ready to be honest, not just to myself but to all the fans and everyone who's been there for me."
He added: "People can say what they want. Everybody's different. I don't think there is a black and white here.
"Everyone has different attractions to people. This is just the way that I am."
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